Marsden

Description of the home

Located near Mcarthy Fair Shopping Centre in shitty Marsden. Looking for a mature adult who's as boring as I am. Someone whose idea of adventure is deciding to boil a second cup of tea. Moving on...

Salutations chat brethren. How goes it? Good? Really? That gladdens my heart. Truly...Now that the empty platitudes are out of the way, I kindly ask that you cast those optic nerves of yours onto the electric picture boxes called photographs that are in my profile. Then ask yourself: "would I be happy maintaining this insane level of cleanliness?" If the answer is "nay" then I'm afraid your reading journey ends here. I bid thee farewell. Please exit the page quietly and without a fuss. If your answer be a resounding "yes!" then behold! The following paragraphs are now open to you...

Righty-oh. Now that we've eighty-sixed those filthy bastards, us OCD clean freaks can get down to business. So I'll be honest with you, this cramped crap-shack, this dwarfish dwelling (I just love alliteration, don't you?) this tiny utilitarian hovel, is not ideal for two people. Mostly because the current tenant (me) is an antisocial introvert. But also because there is no lounge or living area as such. So you have your little room to hang out in and that's it. The other unfortunate thing is the bathroom houses both the shower and the toilet. So when one person is using either of those facilities the other person cannot. This is, of course, an abomination of desolation. A true crime against human decency. BTW did you know that in Ancient Greece toilets were communal? Men and women would sit in one big room together to do their dirty business. Incredulous? Google it. It's absolutely true. Now in 2025 things have changed. But not by much. Sure we don't all sit around in one room, but for alot of households more than one person share a toilet. In the future people will no doubt be appalled by this. By then man will have concluded that we should each be entitled to our very own personal defecation station. Unfortunately we are still far from being civilised. Alas, this is the sad and horrifying state of things. So here I am, at the mercy of a greedy landlord who perennialy bumps up my rent by $50 (was $285pw now $430pw) with my only options being to move out, or try to rent out this spare room which is overpriced, which nobody wants, and is in a suburb filled with mostly pimps and whores and junkies. Assuredly I tell ye, the situation is indeed dire.

*No woke garbage allowed.

Home features

• Ceiling fans

Bills and expenses

Bills included in rent